To Our Absent Fathers


By: Nompumelelo Zinhle Manzini

To our fathers who are not aware of how much pain they are causing us- us these young girls who have become bitter towards any male species. To our daddies who are not aware how much pain they are causing us – we these young boys who are constantly seeking father figures in dark and dingy allies. To our fathers who are not aware of the amount of pain that they have caused us – us the mothers who have to mother and father these children whose hearts are full of pain. To our daddies who are not aware of the amount of pain they have caused us – us the community who have to recurrently father these children even today, when their fathers are not fighting any repressive system that used to be. Instead they are refusing to take responsibility. To our fathers who are not aware of the amount of pain that they are causing us – us the present fathers, husbands and boyfriends who are blamed for their fathers absence.


To us the youth who have to deal with our peers- whom lack father figures. To us the children without these fathers – it’s time that we realise that we may be our father’s sons and daughters however, we are not their choices. Let us stop making excuses for them and let us start acknowledge that we too are persons in our rights and in as much as it may pain us, we have every single right to move forward without barring any guilt. Let us recognise that their absence is not our fault! So, to this is to all of us, all of us who are going to become fathers one day – let us promise ourselves that we will be there for our children. Let us promise one another that we will be there for each other. Only because we are a conscious youth – one that is self-reliant and will develop in unity!

As we celebrate Father’s day this Sunday on the 16th of June, which happens to fall on Youth Day. Let us not be bitter towards any of our fathers, but rather let us show them that as the Youth we will father each other. This is my plea to each and every young person out there to take responsibility of their lives and not drown it in any bottle, under the false impression that Uncle Jack’s whiskey will father you. This is my plea to you, to not judge that girl who just left campus with a man who’s old enough to be her father – but that you should understand that she is just seeking a father figure!

Even though our fathers are not there, let us show them that we are here! In the words of Daniel Beaty in his poem Knock Knock, as young people we should be on familiar terms that “despite [our daddies] absence we are still here, still alive, still breathing with the power to change the world one little boy and girl at a time”.

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2 comments:

  1. Deep, the black dad story is sad. S.C

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  2. "We are our fathers children but we are NOT their choices.." So many people need to realise this.

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